Child abuse – what to look out for

Behaviour of an
adult who abuses children

Behaviour of an
abused child

Physical indications
of child abuse

• Complains that the child is difficult to control;
• Little knowledge of child development.
• Makes unrealistic demands, e.g. expects good bowel control at too early an age;
• May indicate that child is prone to injuries. Lies about how the child was injured;
• Gives contradictory explanations about how the child was injured;
• Inappropriate or excessive use of medical service;
• Seems unconcerned about the welfare of the child.

• Cannot explain injuries, or gives inconsistent explanations;
• Absconds;
• Cringes or withdraws when touched;
• Babies stare with empty expression, rigid carriage, on guard;
• Extremely aggressive or withdrawn;
• Seeks attention from anyone who cares;
• Extremely compliant, tries to please others;
• Becomes scared when other children cry;
• Scared to go home after school. Scared of adults;
• Normal activities arouse anxiety;
• Vandalises things.

• Injuries – bruises, cuts, burns, fractures;
• Various injuries, various degrees of healing;
• Various injuries over a period of time;
• Head injuries on babies and pre-school children, e.g. cuts, bruises, burn marks, abrasions which cannot be satisfactorily explained;
• Injuries such as fractures, abrasions, burns and bruises which cannot be explained;
• Inappropriate clothing to cover the body.

Behaviour of an
adult who abuses children

Behaviour of an
abused child

Physical indications
of child abuse

• Blames the child for own problems and disappointments – child is seen as a scapegoat;
• Continually expresses negative feelings about the child to other people and the child;
• Conduct towards the child expresses continual rejection;
• Withholds herself or himself from verbally or behaviourally expressing love to the child;
• Continually trying to bribe, influence or terrify the child;
• Continually trying to isolate the child, e.g. by prohibiting contact inside and outside the family.

• Aggression, depression or extreme withdrawal;
• Extreme compliance; too well-mannered, too neat, too clean;
• Extreme attention- seeking;
• Extreme control when she or he plays – suppresses own feelings.

• Enuresis (bedwetting) and/or encopresis (soiling) for which there is no physical cause;
• Continual psychosomatic complaints, e.g. headache, nausea, stomach pain;
• Child does not grow and develop according to expectations.

Behaviour of an
adult who abuses children

Behaviour of an
abused child

Physical indications
of child abuse

• Exceptionally protective towards child and jealous;
• Discourages contact with peer-group when there is no supervision;
• Acts seductively towards child;
• Indicates that the spouses have marital problems;
• Abuses alcohol and/or drugs.

• Sexual play with self, others and toys;
• Sexual vocabulary and/or behaviour not age-appropriate;
• Drawings or descriptions with sex theme not age-appropriate;
• Strange, sophisticated or unusual sexual knowledge, e.g. flirtation;
• Promiscuity and/or prostitution;
• Continual absconding;
• Fear of seduction by members of the opposite sex;
• Unwilling to participate in certain activities;
• Sudden deterioration in school progress;
• Poor relations with peers;
• Withdrawal, fantasising, uncommonly childish behaviour;
• Crying without provocation;
• Depression, attempted suicide.

• Pain or unusual itching of genitals or in anal area;
• Torn, stained or bloodstained underwear;
• Pregnancy;
• Injuries to genitals or anal area, e.g. bruises, swelling or infection;
• Sexually transmitted diseases;
• Difficulty in sitting or walking;
• Regular urinary infection.
• Throat irritations and/or soreness or mouth sores owing to forced oral sex.;

Behaviour of an
adult who abuses children

Behaviour of an
abused child

Physical indications
of child abuse

• Behaviour indicates rejection of the child, e.g. child is left in cot or bedroom for long periods of time;
• Ignores the child’s loving approaches, refuses to hold the child’s hand or hold her or him close;
• Indicates the child is unwelcome;
• Indicates the child is difficult to care for, e.g. the child is ‘demanding’ and ‘difficult to feed’.

• Listless and makes few or no demands, e.g. seldom cries;
• Little or no interest in the environment;
• Little or no movement, e.g. lies still in bed;
• Does not react to strangers – attempts to stimulate her or him;
• Shows little fear of strangers, e.g. does not react to them;
• Begs or steals food;
• Continually tired, listless or falling asleep;
• Says that nobody at home looks after her or him;
• Irregular attendance at school;
• Destructive and aggressive;
• Inappropriate clothing, poor personal hygiene, continually hungry;
• Physical and medical needs don’t receive attention.

• The child does not grow, and/or loses a lot of weight (though this may also indicate under-development. A medical examination is necessary to determine the case.)

The following physical characteristics are often present in neglected children:

• Child is pale and emaciated;
• Very little body fat in relation to build, e.g. folds on buttocks; skin feels like parchment owing to dehydration;
• Constant vomiting and/or diarrhoea;
• Developmental milestones not reached within normal age-ranges, e.g. neck still limp at 6 months, cannot walk at 18 months.